Monday, 4 November 2013


I'm going to be honest... lately I feel like I've somehow forgotten my reason for getting up everyday.
That isn't to say that I've lost the will to live or I'm not enjoying life.
I am.
I recently got married to my best friend, we have set up our own home and every day has been an adventure.
But somehow I feel like I've lost sight of the main purpose.
I've been asking myself what's missing and always coming to the conclusion that I've neglected my relationship with God.
I don't make time to read my bible and then wonder why negative and bitter things come out of my mouth when faced with something that knocks me.
I don't pray as much or as promptly as I should and then wonder how doubt and uncertainty has creeped in.
But mostly, I forget to involve God in my day-to-day... I somehow turned into the Sunday meeting attender that I have been forever warned against. Doing things out of routine and religion instead of desire and relationship.  
God understands that life gets busy.
He understands everything we go through and the priorities we need to make in life.
But I'm beginning to understand that my number 1 priority has to be Jesus.
Yes, I have uni assignments, I have to work, and I now have a house to run and a husband to love, but without Jesus none of that matters.
I know there are going to be many times in my life where I am going to have to be reminded of this but that is where I rely on and am thankful for Gods grace.
God reminded me of something this weekend when watching a movie. Densel Washington was in a helicopter about to be taken into a hostile situation and the guy sitting with him said something along the lines of
"isn't it great seeing things from this perspective;
it reminds you of what you're fighting for."
It reminded me of the importance of seeing things from a heavenly perspective, Gods perspective. 
It is when we live from this perspective that we can face the day with purpose, knowing what we're fighting for.
I don't want to just 'fight' for a peaceful or even an adventurous life. Without God it's a losing battle.
Instead I will fix my eyes on Jesus and take my place with Him at the right hand of God. I will let this heavenly perspective be my reality by filling myself with Gods living, breathing word and making him my NO.1 priority.
2 Corinthians 4:18 (NIV), “So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

Tuesday, 30 October 2012

30 Things

So I stumbled across someones blog via Pinterest and she had put this list together of random questions to ask yourself to record different parts of your personality and I guess you get to know yourself a bit better by default. So, i've decided to jump on the band wagon and give it a go! The aim is to make my way through the list by answering one question a day (hopefully) and be done by the end of November! Feel free to join me - give it a go yourself or maybe you can relate to some of my answers! Either way, this could potentially be quite funny or a disaster...Enjoy!
(My answers will be linked from each question.)


Monday, 10 September 2012


It seems to me that there are two types of people...there are those who walk along the paths that are already marked out for them and those who take to the fields and create their own paths for others to follow.
It dawned on me today, as we were driving over Caerphilly mountain, that there was once a time when there were no roads, no allocated pathways...just land. Whether that be fields, forests or deserts, it was land untouched and ready to be explored. Paths were created as people walked the same ground over and over and eventually they got turned into roads.
I love it when you walk through a field of long grass and you can see where people have walked before you because the grass has been trodden down... a path had been created. All it took was one person to venture out for others to follow where they could see it was safe. I don't know about you but if I see a trodden down path on a field I naturally gravitate towards it because it's clear that someone has already been that way, which means it's bound to lead somewhere.
(If you haven't twigged on already I'm using the paths as a metaphor.)
I'm talking about leaders and followers.
There are those who lead the way into new things and those who follow and make the path more permanent. I imagine some of you are already putting yourselves into one of those catagories, which is fine, they're both equally important. But what if I were to say we're all leaders and we're all followers. Every great leader has had to learn what it is to first follow. In following we learn what it is to be humble and to live under authority... There's nothing worse than a proud leader. I believe that it is in all of us to step out of what we already know and lead the way in something new. Whether that be changing a way of thinking or inventing something new. It's in our DNA to seek more than what we already know, to be better than what we already are. The moment we decide we've reached the end of our imaginations we've settled for less than what we have inherited.
I admire those people who discovered countries and invented all those things we now take for granted and pushed for an unseen reality and I admire their faithful followers who humbled themselves to someone else's vision.  But if we all remain followers we will eventually reach a dead end. We can't be scared to tread new ground. We can't be scared to make a dream a reality. We can't let fear of man hold us back from breaking the mold.
I know Jesus and I know that his plans for me are going to lead me to places and things in which I won't have a path to follow, the path will be made of my foot prints and my hand prints and others will walk in them. If I was doing this on my own it would either be frighting or I would become proud of my own efforts but the wonderful thing about them being Jesus' plans is that he has already set the path ahead of me and he is with me the whole way. He only has good plans for me and trusting in him will take me on all sorts of adventures. See, even in being a leader I am still a follower. If you desire to lead others you must learn to follow and continue to follow by surrendering all of your desires to Jesus to gain his desires. Following Jesus is exciting when you really trust that he has good plans for you and he's not leading you blind into a mine field!
So let His desires become your desires and watch where he leads you!  


Friday, 22 June 2012

Be still.

"Be still and know that I am God."

[Psalm 46:10]

Sometimes we get so caught up in the whats, hows and whys of Christianity that we forget what really matters.
What needs to change in my life? How do I change this certain area of my life? Why do I feel this way?
I found myself asking these questions in worship the other day. What is stopping me from worshipping freely? How do I change my attitude? Why are my feelings not changing?
I came before God with all my questions, all my burdens, all my uncertainties. He had one question for me...

Do you know who I am?

You see, the whats, hows and whys are secondary to knowing who God is because the more I know who God is the more free I will become in worship. The more I know who God is, the more my attitude will change. The more I know who God is, the easier it will be to live in the Joy of the Lord despite how I may be feeling.

I hope this is coming accross the way it's intended to.

If you're worrying about how something is going to work out or how you're going to get to where you need to be, stop.
           The whats, hows and whys don't matter. All that matters is that everything we do is from an understanding of who God is. It's then that we can really be still and calm the storms around us because if we truely know that He is God, we will never have a reason to worry about anything else.

So not just in the good times, or the days that are less busy, but in everything;
be still and know that I am God.

Wednesday, 18 April 2012


These last few days God has been speaking to me about the importance of obtaining a vision. In my last post I wrote about how we need to seek the Kingdom of God first so that what we come across on the way doesn't distract us but instead compels us to keep moving forward.
Since writing it i've started to think about how it can be walked out in my every day life and not just be some far off principle I claim to live by.
In my thinking I've realised that having a vision sets principles, morals and values in my life. If I was without a vision I would settle for anything and everything that came my way, I would give up easily, but having a vision restrains my options to obtain it.

Here's an example to help you understand; say you decide that you want to shed a few pounds. You set yourself a diet plan, you get yourself down the gym. A few days in and you wake up feeling like you've overused every muscle in your body. The only thing that is going to get you back to that gym is the vision of a healthier, skinnier you. Without that vision you will fall straight back into what is comfortable. You'll never get your great body by just not wanting to be fat. It is your vision that gives you the strength to reorder your life to reach your goal.
Vision gives you a standard to live by, vision gives pain a purpose, vision gives you purpose, vision gives you motivation and strength to persevere to do whatever you have to do to get it.

I've been reading a book by Kris Vallotton who says "One of the greatest decisions we have to make concerning our vision is how we envision ourselves." and I couldn't agree more. How we envision ourselves will determine our actions, our reactions, our behaviour and our attitude. I've been on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster lately and reading this has challenged me to think about how I see myself because if I had truly decided who I am then my emotions and attitude wouldn't be determind by my situation but instead they would be determind out of who I am. If we lack vision for ourselves then we begin to let others tell us who we are and we will find ourselves being whatever others need us to be and start to rely on them for our strength and self-worth. 

But the great thing is, we have the choice to either live in bondage to our emotions, other people, our physical impulses and our circumstances or we can choose to live as free people because we have set a vision for our lives. We have to choose to take responsibility to know ourselves, to live with intergrity by training ourselves to live in accordance with the vision we have set.

So instead of acting out of how you feel or how others say you should feel, act out of who you envision yourself to be and let your vision for tomorrow determine your decisions today.

Wednesday, 11 April 2012

Step by step.

Have you ever got to that point where you feel like you're at the cliff edge and the only thing left to do is jump, to take that big step of faith because you don't know the outcome you just know that you can either jump or turn back?
Ever wondered how you can get to that point of trusting God so much that that leap of faith seems like a simple step? Impossible? Hmm.
Take the girl in the picture for example. She didn't just appear at that cliff edge, there was a journey that got her there. She had to take a number of steps before reaching that point where she had to jump.
I'm sure there were parts of her journey where she had lots of people around her, where there were road signs showing her the way, where there were distractions on the side of the road. I'm sure she could have been happy spending more time with those people she met or she could have brought them along with her to see the view at the cliff edge (from a safe distance). Or she could have followed the road signs and stuck to the road. Or she may have even found a great bar or church or bingo club where she could have happily been a local. These are all great if your goal is to have great friends around you all the time or to have control or be comfortable.
However, in the grand scheme of things, it's not enough to just have great friends. Its not enough to know where your life is heading. Its not even enough to strive to be an active member of the community. Eventually, they will all fall short.
This girl had her sight set on the Kingdom. Even in the simple steps of every day life her eyes were fixed on eternity so that when people fell short of her expecations she didn't lose hope, when there was no road sign to follow she didn't worry, and when she got to the edge of the cliff it was an easy step to take because she wasn't looking down to monitor her next step, her eyes were fixed on things above, where Jesus is sat at the right hand of God with all things under His feet. She had learnt to trust in God and seek first His Kingdom in the little steps she took so that when it was time for her to leap it was as natural as taking just another step.

Stop seeking friendships & relationships. Stop seeking a job or successful career. Stop seeking the answers to all of your questions. Don't even seek a happy Christian life.
"Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well." [Matthew 6:33] 
We've got it good.

Friday, 9 March 2012

Plan A.

Ok, so if you know me you'll know I would happily watch Will Smith movies all day & I don't think I know anyone who couldn't. We all know him for his acting and slightly less publicised Hip Hop career but it's only today that I saw a bit more of the real Will Smith. You know - the human who doesn't have super powers or have every conversation from a script.
I watched an interview where he shared what he believed to be the secret to his success and I have to admit, I have been inspired. He was driven by the desire to do good and the want for the world to be better because he was here. I would happily quote the whole interview but there were 3 things he said that really stuck out to me and have challenged me to think about how I measure 'success'.

"Being realistic is the most commonly travelled road to mediocrity. What's the point in being realistic?"
What is the point in being realistic? If everyone were realistic in their ideas and dreams then we wouldn't have moved past the stone age.
Reality can be defined as "That which exists objectively and in fact." and therefore, if we never thought further than reality as we know it then we would never know and step into new realities. For example, what if Thomas Edison had let his daydreams be boxed in by reality? We would still be living by candle light!
Our world is how it is now because people have a natural desire for more. Reality isn't enough. Reality is boring.
Success is only acheived when we acknowledge our reality but we aren't held back by it. We don't have to be defined by our reality because we have the ability to define our reality.

"He who says he can and he who says he can't are both usually right."

This statement is so true. So many people don't succeed because they give up trying. You know, if you never give up you're going to succeed eventually.
This is exactly what I mean when I say we can define our realities. The moment you speak something out, it becomes your reality. So if what comes out of your mouth is "I can do this" ,that shapes your reality. If it is "I can't do this", it has the same effect.
A lot of the time we blame our circumstances or situations for our failures but we must come to understand that we aren't ruled by those circumstances but it is infact the choices that we make that decide the outcome.

"Theres a redemptive power that making a choice has, rather than feeling that you're at affect to all the things that are happening around you, make a choice and just decide who you're going to be, what youre going to be, how you're going to do it and the universe will get out of your way."

"There's no reason to have a plan B 'cause it distracts from plan A."
If plan A fulfils your heart desires, gets you excited and pushes you forward, why would you create a plan B? Plan A will only fail if you give up on it. Plan B will only be needed if you choose it. So why waste time planning for something you won't need. Put everything into Plan A! An idea will only become a reality if you work for it. If plan A isn't working, I can only question your commitment to it.


Now I know there's probably atleast one person reading this thinking 'where's God in all of this?' Well, lets go back to the first quote:

"Being realistic is the most commonly travelled road to mediocrity. What's the point in being realistic?" Well, With God I choose to live in a different reality... a heavenly reality where all things are possible and nothing can hold me back.

Second quote: "He who says he can and he who says he can't are both usually right." God tells me I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and therefore to say 'I can't' is to diminish the power of Christ.

Third quote:"There's no reason to have a plan B 'cause it distracts from plan A." My plan A is Jesus. Jesus is the truth and the truth is the only thing that's ever going to be constant. Which is why I am not afraid to give everything I am to Plan A... Success? He's already won it all.

"You cant be scared to die for the truth. The truth is the only thing that's ever going to be constant."